Thursday, May 15, 2008

What's the deal with me lately?!!!

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I've been down lately.. and I just don't know what the deal is.. OK! I do know what the deal is, but I can't say exactly since people actually read this (danget!!!,, so much for venting)
But yeah, I have a lot on my mind.. and it's all just stirring about... sinking in deeper and deeper... and I'm over analyzing everything SO much it's exhausting! I honestly just want to get in my car.. roll down all the windows so the sun warms my face, and drive to no where for a few hours, alone. I'd probably just turn up the radio super loud and let myself cry. I guess it's the realization of certain things... and hating how complicated life is.. Did you ever have an idea of what you thought things were going to be like when you were younger,,, and then you grow up and {BLAM} real life smacks you in the face.. There are sooooo many ups and downs and I'm waiting for a break on the roller coaster so I can just PUKE. I feel like things are going great for a bit.. and then something happens to bring me back down.. then it's fabulous.. and back down!!! I guess I'm just going to continue to force myself to be *optimistic*.. pray, and pray, and pray ,,,, oh, and be very patient! (God thank you for giving my LOTS of patience)
Ok.. I'm feeling better already... no car ride necessary lol.. I just need a hug or something!?! ::::::Loud yell:::::: and I don't have my best girlfriend here to talk to!!!! she's miss "military training chick" waaaaaaaaa!! lol
-Ciao4now
Steeeeeena Bo BiNA

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